


A Little Less Than Kin, and More Than Kind

by Allilouyah, Allypallycally1



Category: Hamlet - Shakespeare
Genre: Abusive Parents, Apartment Neighbours, Bipolar Disorder, I'm sorry I lost my child in the supermarket and now she won't let go of your hand AU, M/M, Minor Character Death, Modern AU, Teen Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-11
Updated: 2015-11-30
Packaged: 2018-03-30 02:55:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3920254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Allilouyah/pseuds/Allilouyah, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Allypallycally1/pseuds/Allypallycally1
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hamlet has admired his neighbour from afar for the year and a half that they've lived in flats opposite each other. So when his daughter, Rose, runs off in a supermarket and ends finding this very handsome neighbour, giving Hamlet an excuse to talk to him, the possibility of a relationship blossoms. But the course of true love never did run smooth...<br/></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

'To buy or not to buy, that is the question,' Hamlet murmured to himself, his fingers sliding over the packet of liquorice on the shelf. 'What do you think Rose, midnight feast tonight?'He turned to look at his now empty hand and panic flooded through him. 'Rose?!' he cried, spinning around. The fact that his usual tag-along had left his side was a little more than distressing - even more so was the fact that he had failed to notice until now.

His black converse slapped the linoleum floor and squeaked as he slid to a halt at the end of the aisle. He continued to call Rose's name as he ran through the supermarket, yanking and pushing disgruntled shoppers' shopping trolleys away as he hurdled past them, his head whipping to and fro trying to catch sight of her.

'You're so tall!' a well-known voice marvelled from around the corner of the nearest aisle.

Hamlet jogged down it to see his daughter, Rose, holding the hand of the stranger and merrily chatting away to him. As the stranger turned, Hamlet suddenly realised that he was not as much of a stranger as he had previously appeared.

The man had moved into the flat opposite his about a year and a half ago, and Hamlet had admired him from a distance ever since. The formality of his attire was dulled by the fact that his suit jacket seemed to be missing, the top buttons of his dress shirt undone. Other than the small child hanging on to his arm, his shoulders were bowed in a slight slump and his confused yet polite smile was cased by a small amount of stubble.

'You have a very pretty cat,' Rose said, nodding earnestly.

'Why thank you, little lady,' the man said, 'I'm sure she thinks that you're very pretty too.'

Hamlet smiled despite himself, clearing his throat to alert Rose to his presence. 'Someone's not getting any of the midnight feast tonight.'

Rose noticed him and her face immediately morphed into an expression of utter despair. 'Why not?!' she wailed.

'Because you ran off. Obviously you don't want to have a midnight feast with me.' He folded his arms, attempting to appear utterly petulant as he restrained a laugh.

'But I just waited a little longer in the toy section and so I let go of your hand for a tiny bit and then I couldn't find you!'

She looked close to tears, and after his attempted parkour Hamlet doubted that the other shoppers would appreciate a wailing child. 'Okay, I'll consider it. Will you come with me now though?' He held out his hand to her, and she hid behind the man's leg.

'No, this nice man is our neighbour, and he can take me home. We'll have the biggest midnight feast ever and you won't be invited.'

Hamlet groaned as the man gave an uncomfortable chuckle. 'I'm so sorry,' Hamlet said, inching forward and offering the stranger a (hopefully) reassuring smile. 'Rose has a special skill in being exceptionally stubborn. I'm Hamlet, by the way, and it looks like you've already met my little one.' Rose pulled a funny face at him as he spoke.

'Horatio.' After awkwardly finding out that his right arm was trapped in Rose's vice-like grip, Horatio instead raised his left hand for Hamlet to shake, and Hamlet took it, giving it one firm pump before his attention was pulled back the matter at hand.

'Rose, please let go of Horatio. We have to go home now to have a fun bath!'

'Baths are for lame brains like you!' Rose stuck her tongue out to punctuate her insult.

'Rose...'

'Horatio is our neighbour.' Rose reannounced, swinging herself from Horatio's abused arm and nearly pulling the man over with her momentum. 'He can come home with us. Then after baths me and him-'

'He and I.'

'-will have the bestest midnight feast in the whole world.' 

'Well if that's the case, then I guess I should go and put all these lovely sweets back, since Horatio will clearly have a much better stock than I do.' Hamlet said, a smirk creeping its way across his lips, widening at the growing terror on Horatio's face that was no doubt caused by the idea of having to entertain such a lively child on such short notice. Hamlet slowly turned around, giving out a big, dramatic sigh and shaking the basket in his hand. 'It will be such a shame, not being able to eat all of this...'

'No! No I was joking! Joking! Jo-king!' Rose went bright red as she lunged for the basket and managed to wiggle her fingers through the criss-crossed wire, holding on tightly. Still, her other hand stayed firmly in Horatio's.

'Come on now, don't be silly anymore. We have to go.'

Rose demonstrated her stubbornness by stamping her foot on the ground and pouting at Hamlet. Horatio cleared his throat. 'It's really no trouble, I can walk back with you guys. I just wanted to buy this anyway.' He held up a box containing a light bulb and shook it as if to emphasise his point. Hamlet mouthed a silent thank you over Rose's head and they started to walk to the checkout.

Thankfully the girl working on the checkout didn't seem fazed when they put their stuff on the conveyor belt separately. They bagged up the sweets and briskly walked out of the shop, Rose completely ignoring Hamlet in favour of talking to her new best friend.

'Did you know that there was this one time that Daddy spent an entire day dressed in a nurse's costume?' she giggled, 'He lost a bet with Mummy. It was so funny!'A small smile of amusement formed on Horatio's lips as Hamlet turned a vibrant shade of scarlet. 

'It was obviously a very attractive look for me.'

The toe of Horatio's shoe scuffed the ground as he focused intently on it, a light pink blush warming the tops of his cheeks. 'I'm sure it was.' He smiled at Hamlet half-heartedly. 'I bet Mummy got lots of pictures, huh?' he asked Rose. She looked up at him, confused.

'No, but we sent her pictures. Mummy doesn't live at home with us. There's not enough space because we only have two bedrooms.'

 

'Oh, I see,' he replied, still focused on the ground.'Look!' Rose suddenly yelled, pointing at a chalked hopscotch design on the ground, 'we can play hopscotch!'

Hamlet shot a glance at Horatio, slightly concerned that his daughter was very energetic and Horatio still seemed intensely focused on the ground in an almost melancholy fashion.'Hmmm?' he said, looking up at the tugging on his hand. 'Hopscotch? Sure, it used to be my favourite game when I was a kid.' They attempted to jump together, causing much amusement for Hamlet when Horatio almost toppled straight over as they both tried to fit on to one square.

'God, you guys are awful at this,' Hamlet said, taking his turn to throw the stone and jump to where it landed - which coincidentally happened to be the same square that Horatio balanced in. He jumped there, landing on one foot and almost knocking Horatio over. His arms instinctively reached out to catch him and they shuffled awkwardly for a minute, focused on fitting both of their rather large feet into one tiny square. They both looked up at the same time, and Hamlet found himself nose to nose with Horatio, staring straight into his eyes. It was only up this close that Hamlet first noticed that Horatio's eyes were different colours - the left was a startling deep blue, with green flecks around the pupil. The right one was a deep brown, with just a tiny fragment bearing the same colour as the other.

'Your eyes,' Hamlet said before his brain had time to compute the statement.

Horatio seemed to flinch and hurriedly looked down. 'I know, they're freaky.' 

'No, they're, uh, l think they're nice,' Hamlet said stupidly

The blush seeped up Horatio's neck as they stood there, balancing on one leg like morons. The moment was broken only by Rose's high-pitched giggle.'I'm winning!'

'Not for long!' Hamlet ran up to her, lifting her high above his head and placing her on his shoulders as she screamed and giggled. 

Horatio grabbed the bags from where they had been hastily abandoned and jogged to catch up with his neighbours. They fell into slightly awkward small talk, unable to maintain one thread of conversation without Rose interrupting them to point out a pretty flower or demand a race to their next crossing. Before they knew it, they were standing in front of their respective front doors.

Prying the small child from his shoulders and plopping her squirming form down next to him, Hamlet dug his hand into his jeans pocket to pull out the key to his door.

'Thanks for helping out with that,' Hamlet said, reaching out and taking one of the shopping bags from Horatio's grip. 'It probably wasn't what you signed up for when you left home.'

'That's one way to put it...' Horatio chuckled, shifting his weighting by switching the bag from one hand to the other. 'It was certainly a little surprising to have an extra limb all of a sudden.' Horatio winked down at Rose who gave a gap-toothed grin in return.

'Nothing wrong with an extra set of hands, believe me.' Hamlet mumbled as he jammed his key into the lock, turning it and pushing the door in with his hip. Rose scampered into the apartment, her hair following her in a small trail as she disappeared past the entrance hall. Hamlet turned back to Horatio, a small smile playing on his lips. 'Do you, I mean, would you like to come in? For coffee, maybe? And a little midnight feast?' He said, opening the door a little wider and holding up the carrier bag, shaking it up and down a little.

Horatio lowered his head, breaking eye contact as he stared at his shoes again with a slight scowl across on his lips. 'I can't, sorry Hamlet, I just have so much work to do-'

'Oh no you don't have to, I was just offering but if it doesn't suit you then that's no problem!' Hamlet raised his hands in a placating gesture, hoping that Horatio wasn't too uncomfortable with turning down his offer of very mediocre coffee and that the disappointment that he was feeling was not as apparent on his face as it felt. 'See you around, I guess?'  
Horatio looked up at that, a genuine smile lighting up his face. 'Sure, see you around. Don't be a stranger!' he called as Hamlet pushed his door closed behind him.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tea parties and the Wiggles.

Hamlet was almost entirely sure that by 'don’t be a stranger', this was not what Horatio meant, but with five minutes to run to get the tube, he was fast running out of options. He expertly balanced Rose on his hip and used his free hand to knock on Horatio’s door. To Hamlet’s caffeine induced mind, the fifteen seconds that it took Horatio to answer the door seemed to last forever.

When the door was finally pulled open, the tiny gap revealed an incredibly sleepy looking Horatio, with the small proportion of his hair that was visible sticking in more directions than Hamlet thought was physically possible.

'Hamlet?' Horatio said through a yawn, before pushing the door back closed with a, 'just give me a second.' Hamlet heard the sound of the chain being taken off and Horatio clearing his throat before the door was thrown back open. It looked as if Horatio had smoothed his hair down, and he attempted to look wide awake despite his bleary eyes.

'Horatio! Look, I’m really sorry to get you up but I need a favour.' Hamlet rattled, putting Rose down and pushing her in front of the door.

Horatio pulled the door open a little wider and blinked owlishly at Hamlet, then at Rose, then back to Hamlet. 'Nah, I was already wide awake,' Horatio said with a nonchalant wave of his hand, his mouth stretched open like a cavern with a yawn. 'A… favour?' He blinked a couple of times, squinting at the harsh sunlight pouring into the hall through a skylight.

'It’s short notice, I know, but could you just look after Rose for a couple of hours? I just, oh… oh I really need to go.' Hamlet ran a hand through his hair as he wished the hands on his watch to tick backwards behind the cracked glass.

'I, uhm, right,' Horatio choked out. 'Yes, Rose can stay with me for a while. What’s the occasion?' Horatio couldn’t stop his eyes from sliding down Hamlet’s well dressed form before flicking back up to the distressed face.

'Job interview. Right now. So late. Goodbye.' The man pushed his little girl towards him before all but taking off running down the hallway, shouting a 'thank you!' over his shoulder. 

Horatio dragged his eyes away from Hamlet’s fast retreating figure and turned to the four year old standing at his feet. She stared up at him, her green eyes wide.

'Right, do you wanna, um, come in?' Horatio stepped aside and Rose immediately ran past him, bellyflopping on to his sofa.

'Your sofa is a lot squishier than ours,' she said matter-of-factly, accompanying her observation with a few test bounces.

'That’s cool. Look, I need to get ready, do you want to watch TV for a bit?' He turned the TV on to Cbeebies for her, his fear of sticky child hands second nature from his experience at work.

The over-acted chatter of the TV filled the small apartment as Horatio slunk back into his bedroom, pulling open the curtains as letting the sunlight fall past him to rest on his unmade bed. He mourned over the loss of his long-anticipated lie-in, figuring the bed was probably still warm, as he dragged himself towards the bathroom, flicking the hot water on as he went.

He could hear Rose singing along to whatever weird Wiggles song was on that morning’s episode and he smiled to himself as he climbed under the hot water. The words were easily deduced, and he found himself singing along as he massaged shampoo into his hair, making up new verses as he went along. 'Get ready, to wiggle. Wiggling in the shower is oh so fun,' he sang to himself as the hot water ran out just as he stuck his head under the water to wash off the suds. 'Get ready, to wiggle, grabbing my towel I’m almost done.'

He was still humming the tune as he walked back into the living room, his hair still damp and his feet bare. Rose was completely ignoring the tv, her attention entirely focused on the cat in her arms. He sat, as he always did, passive and idle, allowing her to forcibly stroke his head, purring as she talked at him.

'Your cat is so cute!' Rose squealed. 'He’s a calico cat,' she said, carefully sounding out each syllable of calico. Horatio smiled.

'I thought he was just a cat!'

'No, silly. There are different types of cat. Like,' she scrunched up her forehead and held out her hand, counting each type she knew off on her fingers, 'calico, and persian, and tabby, and, ummm… That’s all I know. My friend Emily is teaching me.' She beamed at him, the gap where her front teeth should have been made her even more adorable.

'His name is Shakespeare.' He threw himself down on the sofa next to her and began to tickle Shakespeare’s neck.

Her brow furrowed. 'Can I just called him Shakey?' The look of concern on her face was absolute and Horatio couldn’t stop a bark of laughter.

'Of course you can. Do you want to watch something else?' Horatio said, gesturing the remote at the TV.

Rose pursed her lips before answering. 'No thank you.' She sighed.

'What’s wrong?'

'It’s just… well,' she turned to face him, and he managed to stop his laughter this time as seriousness filled her eyes, 'I had planned a tea party for my teddies and me today, but now we can’t have it.'

'You could always have it here, I don’t mind.'

She immediately perked up. 'Really? You’re the bestest!' She ran to the front door, leaving Horatio no choice but to follow.

He cursed under his breath, realising too late the problem of Hamlet’s locked door. He crossed his fingers and bent down to look under the front door mat, the excitement in Rose’s eyes too bright to be refused. His hands touched something cold and metal and he pulled out a silver key. Thankfully, it slotted neatly into the lock and soon they were each collecting up armfuls of teddies.

With the final cuddly toy placed on the picnic blanket in the middle of Horatio’s flat, he turned to his desk and started shuffling through some papers, having no clue where to start and an abject desperation to have it all finished.

'Excuse me,' Rose said, tugging on his trouser leg. 'Teddy says that he wants you to join us.'

He looked to his pile of paperwork, and then back at Rose on the floor. He really didn’t want to start that work right now - and this could technically be counted as research.

'I’d love to join you.' Rose yanked Horatio’s trouser leg again so that he toppled over, straight on to the tea party. 

'You’re squishing Flopsy!'

He hurriedly sat up and sat Flopsy up too, apologising profusely as the cuddly toy rabbit continued to fall back down. 'I think Flopsy wants to go to sleep.'

Rose just sighed, crawling over to where Flopsy was lying on the ground and expertly placing it upright before returning to her side of the picnic blanket circle.

'Shall we begin?'

Horatio was handed a small plastic tea cup and a saucer, which he graciously balanced on his palm with a ‘thank you’ before taking a sip from the cup.

'No! No silly! I haven’t given you any tea yet and it’s rude to drink before everyone else has some as well!' Rose said, shaking the teapot in Horatio’s face and frowning at his bad manners. Her hard and intimidating gaze was locked on Horatio as she pried the cup from his hands and filled it with non-existent tea. After placing it on to his saucer and giving him an extra glare for good measure, she turned and filled up the cups of the stuffed animals sat in a circle of which Horatio was part. When she finally got to Flopsy who was sat next to him, Rose made a point to lean in close to the rabbit and stage whisper, 'Can you believe this guy?' with a big roll of her eyes before she plonked herself down on his other side.

'Is it okay to drink now?' Horatio says, lifting his teacup towards his lips as he peers at Rose.

'No, we need to cheers first.' She says, sticking out her arm with the teacup clasped firmly in her little fingers, attempting desperately to point out her pinkie finger. ' You do it like this, put your cup so it touches mine - not too hard or it will spill - then look at me and say ‘cheers’.'

Following her instructions, Horatio managed to bring a little smile from Rose at his cooperation. 

'Now to everyone else.' As they cheersed every toy in the circle, Rose managed to tip over the tea pot in her scramble to cheers the tiger opposite her before Horatio did, but she shut him up before he could point it out because 'That didn’t actually happen in the game, it was a glitch'. 

When all the cheersing was complete, and Flopsy’s head was pulled out of their teacup, Rose gave the all clear for Horatio to finally drink his air-flavoured tea. Without a second spared, Horatio’s cup flew to his lips and he chugged down his tea with exaggerated gulping and slurping sounds before whipping it away with a great sigh, wiping the excess air from his lips with his sleeve. 'May I have some more of that delicious tea, Miss Rose?'

'Ewww! You drink like an elephant!' She exclaimed, the horror on her face slipping for a giggle at her own hilarious simile.

'Hey,' Horatio said, a hand coming to his chest in mock hurt. 'That’s a really mean thing to say, especially when I’m drinking so much better than Teddy over there!' He gestured at the stuffed bear who sat unphased by the accusation.

'Teddy drinks very well, actually. He was number one at the tea drinking olympics.' Rose said, crossing her arms over her puffed out chest. 

'The tea drinking olympics? I am not worthy to be in his presence!' Horatio gasped. 

'It’s okay for this one time, Teddy likes drinking tea with commoners sometimes to remind himself that he’s the best.'

'Ah, the classic olympic training style.' Horatio said solemnly, his eyebrows slanting together in thought. 'I know it well.'

Rose gasped, shocked. 'How do you know it?! It’s been a secret in Teddy’s family forever!'  
Horatio lifts his gaze to lock eyes with Rose’s wide ones and when he spoke, it was low and slow. 'Because, dear Rose, I am Teddy’s long lost cousin.' 

'No…'

'Yes.'

'No, you’re not. Teddy doesn’t have any cousins.'

'Oh, my bad. Sorry.'

There was a silent pause, neither Rose nor Horatio breaking the eye contact, before they both burst out laughing at their own dramatic moment. 

'So how about that refill?' Horatio said when he thought that Rose had calmed down enough to focus back on the game.

Rose took his cup from him before pouring more tea into it and handing it back. 'You have to drink it slowly this time,' she warned, 'Or else you’ll get a tummy ache.'

'Right, right of course.' Horatio hummed, making sure that she was watching before he took the smallest sip of nothing of which even Teddy would be jealous. 'So your Dad’s gone to a job interview?' 

'Yep.' Rose said, refilling the cup of the teddy bear sitting next to her.

'What does he do?'

'Go to job interviews.'

'No, I mean what does he want to do?'

 

'Get more job interviews.' Rose mumbled around the rim of her cup, her monotone voice giving away that she was already bored of this conversation.

Horatio just chuckled at the memory of Hamlet’s wild and nervous eyes as he shoved Rose into Horatio’s apartment earlier.

Rose placed her cup back on to the saucer and then put them both on the ground. 'I’m finished, that was a lovely tea party!'

'Finished? But we’ve barely even started!'

'But all of the tea is gone!' Rose picked up the teapot and tipped it upside down, shaking it. 'See? No tea is coming out!'

'Oh I see. That’s a shame - do you want to make some more?'

'No thank you. I think we’ve all had enough tea for today.' Just as she finished speaking, her stomach emitted a noise that would have seemed more appropriate for a hungry grizzly bear than this tiny four year old.

'Someone’s hungry! Do you want to help me make some lunch?' Horatio got up and offered his hand to her, desperately trying to think of what he had in his kitchen that a child would eat.

Once in the kitchen, he picked her up, sitting her on the worktop whilst he searched through the cupboard. 'Marmite?' he asked. Rose twisted her features into a look of disgust. 'Okay… how about peanut butter?'

'I love peanut butter!' She banged her heels together in excitement. 'It’s my favourite type of sandwich in the whole world ever!'

'Peanut butter sandwiches it is then!' He began collecting the necessary items and placing each one next to Rose, upon which she promptly inspected each and every one. She made a face at the brown bread.

'Why is your bread brown?' she asked, turning the loaf around in her hands, staring at it intensely.

'Because it’s better for you than white bread.'

'But we always buy bread that is white.'

'Well it’s your loss, because my bread is nicer.' Horatio avoided her eyes, focusing entirely on buttering the bread in fear that she would see through his lies.

'I suppose I could try some…'

He smiled. 'One peanut butter sandwich on brown bread coming right up!'


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little soul spilling, but at least the hot chocolate was good.

The five sharp raps on the door disturbed the bubble war that Horatio and Rose were waging, causing the latter to run off giggling, a few bubbles flying off her dress and leaving a trail through the flat. Horatio attempted to wipe the soap suds out of his hair and grabbed a tea towel on the way to the front door, chucking it over his shoulder as a familiar voice rang through the hall. Rounding the corner, he saw Hamlet laughing at Rose’s recollection of how she managed to get covered in dish soap, their laughter echoing through the flat.

'... so then Horatio put some on my nose and I wiped it on his shirt, and he flicked it at my dress and-' Rose came to a halt as she took a huge breath, dramatically putting a hand to her chest as Hamlet laughed.

'I see, well as long as I don’t have to help clean up then it sounds like good fun.' Hamlet said, finally catching sight of Horatio approaching. 'Unless of course you think that you need some help,' he added.

Horatio grinned, putting a hand on Rose’s damp shoulder as he leaned against the doorframe. 'Well, I am only one man, and it is a warzone in there. Tackling it alone could be the death of me.' 

'If you’re going to be the damsel in distress here then what kind of gentleman would I be if I didn’t come to your rescue?' Hamlet winked.

'Maybe damsel is a bit too much, I prefer the term domestically inadequate.' Horatio said. 'But if we were to do this a little more conventionally, I would invite you in for coffee, or tea, or some equally hot beverage.'

'Do you have hot chocolate?' Hamlet and Rose said in unison.

'Hot chocolates all round, it seems.' Horatio said, stepping aside to let the Hamlet duo make their way towards the kitchen. 'Be careful not to slip on the floor, I’ll be right on that.' He called after them as he ducked inside the utility closet after closing the door to pull out a mop.

By the time he had gotten back to the kitchen, Rose was already back into battle mode, and was trying her best to sniper-attack her father from the countertop to where he was kneeling on the floor, trying to wipe up the soap. 

'Hey, Hamlet, I wasn’t serious about the help you know.' Horatio said, bending down to brush the bubbles out of Hamlet’s hair as Rose deemed herself the victor. 'Just make yourself comfy, I’ll do this and be over with hot chocolate in a bit.'

As Horatio’s fingers tickled through his hair, Hamlet couldn’t help but notice how intimate it felt. Even though there was almost no contact, he couldn’t help but become hypersensitive to the unfamiliar feeling.

'Oh, uh, yeah of course, I don’t want to get in the way.' He mumbled. 'Come on Rose, Get down from the counter.'

Hamlet stood up and turned to retrieve his child from the countertop with the full intention of following on to deposit her onto the sofa. This sequence of actions was stunted as Rose decided to hiss at Hamlet, skittering on all fours across the countertop and out of Hamlet’s react.

'I am the bubble queeen,' she hissed. 'You can’t take me from my hive!'

Hamlet sighed, his shoulders drooping. 'Aw, not right now Rose, I’m not in the mood to play this. Get off the counter and sit yourself anywhere outside of the kitchen please.'

Evidently Hamlet’s control as a parent, or simply the monotonous and strained tone, was enough to snap Rose from her pretenses. She mumbled a disheartened ‘okay’ before clambering to the floor and making towards the living room. Hamlet brought his hand to her head as she passed and praised her cooperation with a 'good girl' as she passed, and she gave him a quick hug to his leg before scampering to find Shakey and entertain herself.

Horatio glanced up at Hamlet from his current mopping mission, making sure not to keep staring as Hamlet’s deflated form moved to take a seat at the kitchen table.

'How did the interview go?' Honestly, that seemed to be the only option as an explanation for Hamlet’s seemingly uncharacteristically melancholy air. 

'How did you guess?' A bitter smile slipped across Hamlet’s face and Horatio offered a simple shrug. 'It didn’t… It wasn’t as smooth as I’d hoped.' 

'How so? I’m sure you rocked it, you seem like you’d ace job interviews.'

'Hmm, well I’m sure that if I really could ‘ace’ an interview, I’d have a job already.' 

'It must be tough raising Rose.' Horatio stood up straight, leaning against the mop handle to catch Hamlet’s attention.

This brought a more sincere smile to Hamlet’s face. 'I make it work.'

Horatio shrugged as he said, ‘Fair enough.’

'It’s a long story, so I’m going to start seven years ago…' Hamlet giggled at the widening of Horatio’s eyes. 'Nah, I’m kidding. We get a fair amount of child support from Rose’s mother, and I’d like to say that I have a special talent in making money stretch.' 

'So Rose’s mother has a job then?' 

'Oh yeah, Ophelia has always been able to win over whoever she wants. I guess it’s a good job her interviewer was a man.' Horatio snorted as he turned to put the kettle on and grab some mugs and hot chocolate sachets from the cupboards.

'Are we bordering on sexism here? Is this some unresolved bitterness?' Horatio said, hoping that he wasn’t overstepping an emotional line here.

'What? Oh no, Ophelia and I are close, she would probably make that joke about herself, then rip one on me. We were lucky, we split up just after Rose was born. It turns out that we weren’t as compatible as we originally thought,' he smiled to himself, 'the whole pregnancy and responsibility thing lead to some self reflection you know? It was a teen pregnancy, we were young and stupid - experimenting, I guess. It was an accident, but neither of us wanted to give this chance up. Do you know how incredible it feels, Horatio? To see something that you helped to create living and breathing and calling your name? It was an accident, yes, but Rose was never a mistake. Ophelia moved away and I got Rose, of course we were expecting me to get my life on track a few years ago, but her dad has also given a lot to support us.' Hamlet looked down, embarrassed at his sudden outburst.

Horatio didn’t miss a beat. 'What about your own parents, do they help at all?'

'We get on just fine with what we have. Rose seems happy enough, but I still need to get on my feet, you know?' Horatio didn’t miss how Hamlet easily evaded his question, but didn’t push it. 'I mean, I’m going to need to help with school, and they grow so fast at this age, clothing and new toys and new foods,' he sighed, 'it only gets more expensive from here on.'

Horatio set the mugs of hot chocolate in the table, nodding politely to Hamlet’s speech, sensing a full rant on the horizon. 

'Aw yes, Rose! Hot chocolate’s ready!' Hamlet called, and about two seconds passed before little thumps rumbled across the room and Rose skidded to a stop at the kitchen table.

'HOT CHOCOLATE TIME!' She shrieked, scrambling up into Hamlet’s lap and stretching out her little arms towards the steaming mugs.

'Be careful it’s hot!' Horatio said just as Hamlet deftly pulled the mugs out of her reach. She stuck her bottom lip out it a pout and folded her arms petulantly with a ‘hmpf’ noise before climbing on to one of the kitchen chairs and staring at the hot chocolate longingly.

'I have a very strong mouth you know…' She reached for one of the mugs, stopped only by the light tap that Hamlet placed on her outstretched hand.

'I know. But it tastes nicer when it’s not scalding hot, I promise.' His tone was completely honest, and Horatio marvelled at how well he’d got parenting down. Some of the parents of ten year olds that he knew couldn’t get their kids to behave half as well as Rose.

'Well then if I can’t have it, then why did you call me?' Rose whined, giving Hamlet’s hand a small slap.

'Uh, well I was excited too…' Hamlet mumbled. 'I’m sorry, it won’t be long until we can have it.'

'Tell you what, Rose,' Horatio piped up. 'How about you go turn the TV onto something you like and I’ll bring your drink when it’s cool enough to drink. How does that sound?'

'Am… I allowed to drink it in front of the TV?' Rose said, eyes flicking between Hamlet and Horatio. Horatio nodded at Hamlet.

'Just this once.' Hamlet confirmed. 'A special treat for behaving so well with Horatio today.'

Rose made a small ‘whoop!’ sound before darting off towards the TV in the corner of the open plan apartment, stopping midway to turn and shout, 'Don’t forget to bring the hot chocolate as soon as it’s ready!' 

'Don’t you worry, little lady!' Horatio called back. 'It’ll be with you in no time!' Horatio turned back to Hamlet as the volume of the TV increased. 'How do you do it?' He asked, bringing Hamlet’s attention back to meet his dichromatic irises.

'Do what?'

'You know…' Horatio stumbled, gesturing towards Rose. 'That.'

'I’m unclear. Are you wanting me to tell you how babies are made? Because I will do all the cleaning in the world to avoid this conversation.'

'No! Gosh, no! I mean, she’s so… she just does what you ask her to, how? I’ve seen my fair share of kids her age and my general view is that they’re not… like her.' Horatio scratched his head, fairly certain that the mis-mash of words that had just tumbled out of his mouth had made limited to no sense in the order that he had said them.

'I think I understand what you’re getting at.' Hamlet said, raking a hand through his hair. 'I mean, if she was an uncooperative child, I would have given her away long ago, to Ophelia or otherwise: There’s no way I could handle some of the tricks I’ve seen other kids pull, it’d destroy both of us. And maybe that’s what gets her to behave. I’ve always been blunt with Rose, maybe sometimes brutally so, and so I think she understand her - our situation better than most kids her age would.' A small, bitter laugh slipped from Hamlet. 'But it’s difficult, you know? Then, and now, I catch myself wondering whether I’ll ever get the hang of raising a child. It’s a lot harder than my parents made it seem, there’s dietary needs, and lifts, and school supplies, and then she gets sick...but then I remember that it’s completely irrelevant if I’m good enough or not, because I’m pretty much the only option she has.' Hamlet cleared his throat, because he was absolutely not about to get emotional right now. 'Sorry, I must really be boring you!'

Horatio chuckled behind his knuckles. 'Hamlet, you are about ten years less boring than almost anyone I’ve had this much exposure to,' Horatio pushed a mug of hot chocolate into Hamlet’s palm. 'And honestly whatever you have to say to me, or to anyone, or to no one, the least I can do is listen to you. From what you’ve told me, it seems as though there’s been very little of that in your life - listening, that is.' Horatio picked up a mug and delivered it to Rose with a warning not to spill it, before he returned to the kitchen table. He faltered slightly when he glanced back at Hamlet’s awestruck face. 'G-God! Don’t look at me like that! You’re making it seem like no one’s ever shown you a shred of human decency!'

Hamlet came to, metaphorically picking up his jaw from the floor. 'Ah, hah, sorry about…' He watched Horatio pull a chair round to sit on Hamlet’s side of the table, the back of the chair facing Hamlet as Horatio straddled the chair, folding his arms over the top of the backrest. 

'Now,' he said. 'Tell me more about Ophelia, or Rose, or what you want to do as a job. Anything really, just talk to me, it looks like you need it.'

So Hamlet talked, and by the time he deemed himself finished, the hot chocolate mugs were empty, and the sun was casting golden rays that splayed themselves across the floor and up the walls, ready to slip away into darkness. Poor Rose had fallen asleep hours ago, her little snores barely audible over the late night chatter of the TV.

Hamlet helped Horatio pick up the scattered tea set and teddies, and Horatio took it all, allowing Hamlet to scoop up Rose in his arms. They walked over to Hamlet’s door in companionable silence.

'Thanks again, Horatio.' Hamlet whispered as Horatio unlocked his door for him placing the tea party equipment just around the corner of the doorway. 'Really, you were amazing help today.'  
Horatio waved the comment off. 'It was nothing Hamlet. I’m glad you asked for help, and I’m glad that we’re not strangers anymore.'

Hamlet almost rolled his eyes. 'After spilling half my life story to you, I would hope not.  
'  
Horatio laughed, 'So, uh… I guess it’s goodnight?'

'I suppose so, goodnight, Horatio.'

'Night, Hamlet.'


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little bit of fire and Horatio to the rescue.

While he was filling out yet another application form, Hamlet was less than surprised to experience the huge rumbling eruption from his stomach. Dropping his pen and scrubbing a hand over his face, Hamlet slumped against the backrest of the chair with a groan.

'Whaddya say, Rose, is it time for dinner?' 

The small human bean exploded from the pillow fort that seemed to have grown from the side of the couch in the late afternoon. 'YES! Food time!' She cheered, tearing across the room to take her place on the counter to watch her father make a sandwich, as was their daily routine.

'What do you feel like today, sweetheart?' Hamlet said, leaning down to kiss her forehead as he passed her counter seat. He shuffled over to the cupboard next to her, and they both peered inside at its meager contents. 'Alright, we have… crackers, bread, peanut butter, Nutella- no. No Nutella. Oxo cubes, rice…' Hamlet closed to cupboard and moved over to the fridge. 'Cheese, maybe… oh?' Hamlet leaned into the depths of his fridge and pulled out a pack of salmon. It was only a couple of days out of date, and surely couldn’t be that bad. He was sick to high heaven of toast. It was likely that he had bought this fine food in a spur of the moment vow to eat better, but apparently no use had come of it yet. 'Fancy something different for dinner today?' He waved the fish in the air.

'I like peanut butter toast, but it will do.' Rose’s apparent maturity never failed to tickle Hamlet.  
It couldn’t be that hard to cook. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and quickly googled 'how to cook salmon', getting a result that included many images that looked nigh on impossible to cook. He added 'easy' to the end of his search and clicked on the top link.

Five minutes later, the salmon was in the pan and rice was boiling on the stove. Despite the extra time it took and the way that Rose had moaned that it was taking to long, then given up waiting and had run off to play in the living room, Hamlet was feeling incredibly proud of himself. His culinary exploits had never extended further than microwave dinners and the occasional barbeque, so this was a definite leap forward.

Sadly, this pride was to be short-lived.

After leaving the food for a few minutes to check on Rose, Hamlet had sat and got rather engrossed in her game with her dolls and teddies. It was after twenty minutes had passed and a strange smell wafted through from the kitchen that Hamlet remembered the food cooking and got up, swearing rather loudly, and running back into the kitchen.

The salmon sat flaming in the pan, and the first tendrils of smoke just beginning to emanate from it.

'Oh Hell!' Hamlet screeched, his eyes scanning the room for an option to put out the fire quickly and easily. Unfortunately, he found the sink tap.

'Daddy, what’s happened-'

'Rose say out of the kitchen!' Hamlet shouted, shoving a bowl under the tap to fill it with water. After a quick glance to see that Rose had indeed planted herself outside the kitchen, and seeing that she stood just outside the line that ended the carpet of the living room into the lino kitchen flooring, Hamlet stepped up to the fire pan and dumped the water into its contents.

The pan exploded, the fire blowing out and upward like a mushroom cloud on his stove. Hamlet was vaguely aware of Rose screaming as he stumbled backwards, but his heart was beating so fast at the unexpected turn of events that there wasn’t much being processed other than the fire that had swallowed the kitchen roll, the bread basket and other such things that in retrospect should not be placed next to the stove. Hamlet watched the flames lick upwards and claw at the cupboards that he now realised actually held the fire extinguisher that would have been so much easier and more convenient and more safe to use. After his breath had found its way back into his lungs, Hamlet realised that, yeah, he should probably try and put out this all-consuming fire. He reached for a tea towel that was hanging off the counter, proud of himself for remembering that he could probably smother the flames out, but alas, the tea towel was also on fire. So that immediately got dropped onto the floor. 

All that was left was for him to stand there, having not a damn clue as to what to do about the burning hellscape that was absolutely not going to be allowed to hurt his little girl. 

Then a miracle happened.

'Hamlet!'

'Daddy!'

Hamlet turned his attention from the disaster to see Horatio’s sock clad form skid into his kitchen and not wait for breath before letting loose the entire contents of the fire extinguisher in his hands.The 40 seconds that it took for the small household extinguisher to empty itself seemed to last forever, and when it ended, Hamlet stood completely still, staring at Horatio, who stared back at the man that was almost completely covered in whatever comes out of extinguishers. 

And then Rose laughed. She wailed and squealed and shrieked with laughter that shook her whole form. 

'Ah… hah… S-sorry-' Horatio tired to swallow his giggles, he really did. The way that Hamlet was staring at him from behind the coating of foam seemed to ground him to some degree. 'Hey, no really I’m sorry- are you alright?! Hamlet, c’mon say something!' Horatio deposited the extinguisher on the table and crossed the kitchen in a few short strides, coming to a halt right in front of Hamlet. 'You didn’t get burnt, right?' Horatio reached up with both his hands and tried to wipe the foam from Hamlet’s face. The thing was that he didn’t really manage to, because every time his fingers slid over Hamlet’s face, he just ended up smearing it around.

'How did you get here?' 

'What?' Horatio met Hamlet’s eyes that had been focussed solely on Horatio’s this entire time to the point that it was slightly uncomfortable. 'Oh, well Rose nearly banged down my door, she was screaming to come help ‘cause there was a fire, so I came to help' you know, ‘cause there was a fire?' Horatio realised that he still had his hands on Hamlet’ face, an awkwardly let them drop to his sides.

In a flash, there was a look of absolute horror covering Hamlet’s face. 'Oh… Oh Lord Horatio please don’t tell anyone about this! I just wanted to cook some fish and I left it for like two minutes, it was two minutes I swear!' Hamlet seized Horatio’s shoulders in a tight grip. 'Please, don’t tell anyone, they might - they’ll tell social services and - and -' His eyes flicked behind Horatio towards where Rose was clambering up onto the table, trying to get her hands on the foam machine. 'They might take Rose away from me.' He whispered, his eyes widening in fear.

'Hey, c’mon now Hamlet don’t -'

'I didn’t mean to put her in danger Horatio, you’ve gotta believe me the last thing I want to do is hurt her, I-I love her so much I couldn’t live with myself if I-'

'Alright, alright'. Horatio pried Hamlet’s hands from his shoulders, holding them and squeezing them lightly to catch his attention. 'I’m not going to tell anyone, and I have no doubt that all you want to do is protect Rose. No one’s going to take her away from you. Just do what you need to do to calm yourself down.' The wild look in Hamlet’s eyes melted into a mild confusion, then they slipped closed and he allowed himself to take some deep breaths with long exhales. 'There you go. Alright, take it easy okay, go take a shower and clean up- I’m really sorry, by the way.' 

Horatio brought his hand up again and slicked back a strand of Hamlet’s foamed hair, breathing out a chuckle. 'I’ll take care of… this.' Both men turned to look at the disaster zone of ash and foam. 

Hamlet smirked, clapping a hand down onto Horatio’s shoulder. 'Domestically challenged indeed. Good luck.' He sauntered past a deflating Horatio, dragging a finger over his foam covered clothes to wipe it onto Rose’s nose as he approached her, causing her to squeal and hastily rub it off onto her sleeve. 'Are you okay, sweetheart?' He murmured, eyes flicking over her form for any visible injury. 

Rose nodded, shuffling over to the edge of the table to wrap herself around her dad. ' ‘M okay, daddy, that was scary though.' She mumbled into his shirt.

'Yeah, it was. I’m sorry, Rose, I really am. From now on, no more salmon, yeah? Aw, come on, don’t do that…' Hamlet pried her off of him, her front now covered in the foam. 'Let Horatio clean your face and then go change, okay?'

'Okay. Then can we have sandwiches?'

'Of course, then we can have sandwiches. You can join us if you like?' Hamlet glanced over his shoulder to see Horatio pull a washcloth from the sink before meeting Hamlet’s eyes and giving a thumbs up. Hamlet returned the gesture and proceeded to shuffle out of the kitchen and into the bathroom down the hall.

The sound of the shower put thoughts in Horatio’s head that he tried to shake off as he attempted to come up with something to make from the few foods that were in the fridge and cupboards. Everything he picked up was dangerously out of date or incredibly mouldy, and ended up joining the ruined salmon and rice in a large mound on the side. Just as he was tipping the last remnants in the bin, the bathroom door opened with a creak and he could hear Hamlet move into the corridor.

'We’re ordering pizza,' he said as he closed the bin lid with a thud. 'I’ll pay.'

He looked up at this point, his cheeks reddening as he took in Hamlet’s attire - or distinct lack thereof. He stood, towel wrapped around his waist and droplets of water dripping from his hair and sliding down his broad shoulders and down his pale torso, following his sides inwards towards his waist. The towel was so low slung that Horatio had to look away and forcibly close his mouth from where it had dropped open.

Hamlet continued to rub his hair with another towel. 'Sure, I think there’s a leaflet in there somewhere.' He gestured to the drawers in the kitchen and Horatio nodded, still not meeting his eyes. He cleared his throat.

'Cool, I’ll, um, any particular order?'

Hamlet had only just made sense of why Horatio was suddenly acting so awkwardly and hoisted up the towel slightly, standing up straighter. 'One pepperoni, one cheese?'

'Ss..sure. I’ll get it ordered.'

'Yup. Cool. And I’ll,' Hamlet pointed down the hall to where his bedroom was, 'go and get dressed.'

Horatio nodded. 'Cool.' He only risked one glance at Hamlet’s retreating figure and noted some rather strange looking scars across his back and down his shoulderblades. They didn’t look recent but the skin was red and puckered all around them in long, sharp lines. Despite them being so obviously on display he felt awkward witnessing them, feeling like they weren’t meant for his eyes to see. He didn’t dare look up again before he heard the bedroom door close, rummaging in the drawers with his eyes firmly focused at the drawers, and only the drawers. He allowed He finally found the menu and sighed, taking his phone out of his pocket and dialling the number.

Rose ran up to him. 'Are we getting pizza?' She jumped up and down excitedly in front of him and the dial tone rang in his ear. 'Can we get garlic bread? Please?'

He smiled down at her and placed the order, amused by the way she punched the air when he asked for garlic bread as well. Flopping on to the sofa next to her, he switched on the TV and she sat beside him, falling asleep. The news headlines flashed in front of their faces as Hamlet padded up behind them, kissing Rose on the head and hovering behind the sofa. 'Do you want to watch a DVD?' Rose yawned and nodded.

'Can we watch the Lion King?' she asked, turning around to face him.

'Of course, we can always watch the Lion King.' He walked round to flop on the sofa in between them, lounging so that his arms lay across the back of the sofa.

As the Circle of Life started playing, Horatio restrained the urge to sing along. The Lion King was one of his all-time favourite films, and every time he watched it he would sing every part of every song. It wasn’t until the opening bars of I Just Can’t Wait to Be King that he began to mutter the words under his breath. Hamlet looked at him quizzically until he realised what he was saying, at which point he began to sing along too.

'Oh I just can’t wait to be King… Oh I just can’t waiittt…' It was at this point that the door buzzer buzzed, interrupting their impromptu karaoke session.

'PIZZA!' Rose yelled happily, running to the door and down the stairs outside. Hamlet and Horatio were close on her heels, and managed to catch her just before she opened the main door to the flats. Hamlet picked her up and swung her on to his hip where she happily settled, lying her head on his shoulder.

Horatio looked through his wallet to get out the right notes before opening the door and freezing in place. The pizza delivery guy looked shocked as well, holding the pizza boxes and attempting to avoid eye contact.

'Oh, hi,' he said, still not looking directly at him. 'How’ve you been?'

Hamlet looked between the two of them shrewdly, trying to understand this sudden awkward atmosphere.

'Good thanks Bernie, how about you?'

'Good thanks. I didn’t know you lived round here.'

'I could say the same to you - I’m here for work.'

'Obviously I’m not,' Bernie laughed slightly and gestured to his uniform before pausing for a few seconds. 'It would be cool if we could catch up sometime.'

'Sure, I’ll let you know.'

Hamlet’s stomach chose this moment to rumble like thunder, providing a welcome diversion for all of them.

'Oh yeah, sorry, here’s your pizza.' Bernie held out the pizza and Horatio gave him the money, both making quick goodbyes and waving awkwardly before stepping back.

Once round the other side of the door and out of view of Bernie, Hamlet cocked an eyebrow. 'You know him?'

Horatio let out a long breath. 'My ex. I haven’t seen him in about a year and a half - we ended it when I moved here. I can’t do long distance.'

Hamlet nudged him as they began to walk back up the stairs. 'Any chance of a romantic reunion now he’s here?'

Horatio laughed. 'I don’t think so - to be honest moving was one of many things and a convenient excuse that got nobody’s feelings hurt.'

Hamlet just nodded, looking down at his feet. 'Ahh.'

The awkwardness was instantaneously dissipated when the pizza boxes were opened and the film was unpaused, and as the credits rolled Horatio turned to see both Hamlet and Rose asleep next to him. He tidied up as quietly as he could and covered the two of them with a blanket before writing a short note and laying it on the sofa next to the sleeping figures. He tiptoed out of the flat, checking the door was locked as he went, and finally curled up in bed, contemplating the strange turn of events.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Miraculours adventures of Horatio and Hamlet!

The loud rapping at the door awoke the father-daughter snoozing duo, both feeling rather groggy as they sat up.

'Who is it?' Hamlet called out, rubbing his tired eyes and spotting a small piece of paper fluttering to the ground next to him. He reached for it as a muffled voice answered his call.

'‘Tis I, your dead grandmother, here to take you with me to the netherworld!' Horatio shouted across the door, regretting it soon after as the older man unlocking his door down the hall gave him a weird look.

'I’m on my way, Grammy!' Hamlet tossed the note onto the counter as he passed to unlock the door. Horatio’s amused face greeted him as the door swung open.

'Grammy? Is that what you call your grandmother?' Horatio chuckled as he passed Hamlet into the apartment. 

Hamlet shrugged. 'Your guess is as good as mine, I never met my grandmother.'

'You missed out, Grannies are great.' Horatio moved into the living room and spotted a groggy Rose sitting up to inspect the room’s newest addition. 'Rose, you’re still here? Didn’t your Dad put you to bed?' Horatio asked, putting his hands on his hips as he frowned at Hamlet who came to stand next to him.

'Nope, but in Dad’s defence, Rose didn’t put him to bed either.'

'That’s not my job...' Rose mumbled, not yet coherent enough to detect the sarcasm. 'Horatio…' She held her little arms out for the man, trying to wiggle her way out of the blanket cocoon that she had twisted herself into.

'Good morning, Little Lady.' Horatio said, bending over the couch to pick her up, still wrapped in her blanket. 'And no, it’s not your job to put Dad to bed, he was just being silly.'

'As much as I appreciate you being here Horatio, why are you here?' Hamlet reached above his head, stretching out the kricks in his spine that he gained from sleeping on the couch. 

'You didn’t see my note?' Horatio played with Rose’s hair as she leant her sleepy head on his shoulder. Rolling his eyes at Hamlet’s shrug, he continued. 'Your food supply is either toxic or nonexistent. I’m taking you shopping to get some actual nutrients. That is, assuming you have no other plans, in which case I’ll just leave.'

A muffled 'Noooooo,' sounded from Horatio’s shoulder, in which Rose’s face was pressed. 

Hamlet chuckled. 'Well, I don’t, but you do, don’t you Rose?'

Rose perked up at that. 'I do?' She asked.

'I told you, you’re going over to Mum's for the weekend, remember?' Hamlet twisted around to check the time on the kitchen clock. 'And Ophelia should be arriving to pick you up in about half an hour, and I hate myself for not waking up earlier. We have to get a shimmey on, Rose.'

He took her from Horatio and gently placed her on the floor, his hand on her back to guide her to her room.

'Just bare with us for a while, we can go out after Ophelia has left with Rose, sound good?' Hamlet leant on Rose's doorframe to face Horatio after she had been successfully pushed inside. 'Make yourself comfortable,' he said, gesturing to the sofa and TV.

'Sure thing.' Horatio gave a small salute to Hamlet as he disappeared into the remaining bedroom before collapsing on to the couch.

'Daddy! I can't find my blankey!' Rose called across the hall, causing Hamlet to emerge from his room, pulling a jumper on over his head as he strode into her room.

'Alright, did you look under your bed?'

'Yes!' Rose wailed.

'Okay, don't shout, let's look in your wardrobe.' 

Horatio chuckled at the interactions between father and daughter, finding the incredibly domestic scene comical. It wasn't long ago that he was a young adult, he thought he was invincible, that nothing would hold him down, and now looking at Hamlet searching for his daughter's other shoe, he realised how much he really could be a father at this age. 

Being responsible for another life was much more daunting as a probability than a possibility.

After the blanket had been found, it seemed to be smooth sailing. The pair worked in tandem with each other, brushing their teeth and checking each other that there were no 'Hidden grime balls' between any two teeth. Rose was flitting about independently, knowing what she needed for the weekend with her mother’s as Hamlet flew like a whirlwind through the small apartment in an effort to make it appear more presentable.

The bell rang just as Hamlet closed the door of his bedroom, chucking in one last sock before running to let her up.

'Mommy’s here!' Rose cheered, lugging her small suitcase into the hallway. 'Horatio! Mommy’s here!' She darted over to Horatio, pouncing onto the couch and beaming up at him.

'It seems so, Rose.' Horatio said, playfully ruffling her hair. 'You’re just going for the weekend, right?'

Rose hummed out an affirmative. 'I’m not going for ages so you’d better take care of daddy while I’m away, okay?'

Horatio’s chuckle was drowned out by the sweet jingle of a laugh that was heard as the apartment door swung open. Horatio’s attention was grasped by the woman that strode into the room, her high heels clicking on the ground as if that were a status in itself. She made her way into the kitchen to place her handbag on the table, and Horatio caught sight of the long, glistening blonde hair that cascaded down her slim back, held back by the sunglasses that were perched on top of her head.

 

'Mummy!' Rose was off the couch in a flash, skidding to a stop in front of her mother.

Ophelia turned around, her sunny disposition making it seem as if a sour look could never stain her lips. 'There’s my special girl!' She said, squatting down to pull Rose into a hug. 'Are you all packed and ready to go, sweetheart?' She asked smoothing down Rose’s ruffled hair.

'Yep!' Rose popped the ‘p’ before twirling out of her mother’s grasp. 'Before we go, you have to meet Horatio!' She took Ophelia’s hand and pulled her towards where Horatio was sprawled on the couch.

Immediately, he stood up and pulled a hand through his mess of curls. 'Hi-Hey. I’m Horatio.' He held his hand out for her to shake.

'Oh! Hello Horatio, I’m Ophelia, Rose’s mother.' Ophelia responded, gently taking his hand for a moment before dropping it. 

'Yeah, uh, Horatio is our neighbour, we met a couple of days ago and he’s been helping me with Rose.' Hamlet said, wandering into the living room.

'And he has a cat called Shakey too, mum! And he’s really bad at drinking tea!' Rose continued to prattle on, raising her arms for Ophelia to pick her up. Ophelia lifted Rose up and placed her on to her hip. 

'I’m just about to take Hamlet shopping for some decent food.' Horatio said, bumping Hamlet with his shoulder.

Ophelia’s smile widened slightly and a perfectly shaped eyebrow rose up her forehead. Her bright and intelligent eyes flicked between the two men. 'Be careful what you get yourself into, Horatio, this boy is a lot more lazy with cooking than he’s prepared to let on. Don’t let him fool you into thinking he will definitely use the fancy cheese. He won’t. Trust me, I know.'

'Aw, Ophelia why do you have to always bring that up, it was one time!' Hamlet slumped slightly, his hand coming up to rub the back of his neck.

'I’m just teasing, you know I don’t mean it!' Ophelia giggled. 'Well, good luck, anyway. Rose and I should scram before the lunchtime rush hits. You ready, Rose?'

'You betcha!' Rose said, clearly a direct quote from one of her TV shows. 'Bye-bye Daddy!' Hamlet ducked in to give Rose a quick squeeze and a kiss on her temple.

'Bye-bye, Rose.' He said, before kissing Ophelia on the cheek. 'Be safe, okay?'

'You too.' Ophelia replied, and there was a moment of lingering eye contact, before she put Rose down, turned around and moved to pick up Rose’s luggage after shrugging on her handbag. Just as she was ushering Rose out of the door, she twisted round again to Hamlet. 'We’ve decided on a date, by the way. You should be getting your invitation in the mail, so don’t forget to check.' Her eyes almost unnoticeably flicked to Horatio before returning to Hamlet. 'Let me know if you want to bring a plus one.' 

'Sure.'

And then Ophelia was gone.

'Wow.' Horatio breathed. 'She is… wow. What are you getting invited to?'

'She’s getting married.'

'You two were never…?' Horatio left the question hanging in the air.

'Married? God no. Rose was the result of a one time thing that would never have worked in the long term. Phe and I are great friends, but we would never have worked as a thing like that.' Hamlet shrugged. 'What we have is a little weird, but I like it. Plus, Tiggy and her work so well together.'

'Tiggy?'

Hamlet smiled. 'Short for Antigonus. Tiggy was her pet name for him but I heard about him so much before I met him that by the time I met him the name had stuck in my head. I think he prefers Goney.'

'I see.' Horatio glanced down at his watch. 'Shall we head out?'

'Yup, let me just grab my stuff.'

Ten minutes later Hamlet pushed a trolley through the doors of the nearest supermarket, Horatio strolling by his side.

'So am I supposed to know what we’re shopping for?' Hamlet said, automatically heading towards the canned foods aisle.

'Real food.' Horatio said, taking the front of the trolley and leading it to the vegetables where he expertly navigated to the carrots, grabbing a bag and placing them in the bottom of the trolley.

Hamlet made a face. 'What am I supposed to do with carrots? I don’t know how to cook carrots.'

Horatio rolled his eyes. 'There are so many different ways that you can cook carrots. Just google it.'

Hamlet shrugged and went to push the trolley out of the fruit and vegetable aisles. Horatio hooked his fingers into the end of it and dragged it back to him. 'What do you think you’re doing?'

 

'We got carrots. What else can we need? We have grapes and stuff anyway.' Hamlet shrugged.

'Wait here.' Horatio raced around the aisle, grabbing various items. He held up each one and named it before putting it in the trolley, trying to get Hamlet to remember for the next time he was shopping. 'Apples. Oranges - good for vitamin C. Potatoes - I got big ones because you can do more with them.'

'I’m not going to remember any of this you know.' Hamlet said, leaning his head on his hands, elbows resting on the handle of the trolley.

'You’ll just have to bring me along next time as well then,' Horatio replied, turning and walking to the next aisle. Hamlet followed slowly.

'You must have better things to do than help me be a functional adult. Not that I don’t appreciate this, because I really do, but…' Hamlet rubbed his hand through the back of his hair awkwardly. 'Yeah, thanks.'

Horatio chuckled. 'Whether or not I have anything better to do is irrelevant when your kitchen looks like we're living in a famine.' Horatio placed two bags of rice into the trolley. 'And it's really no problem.' 

The shopping went relatively smoothly after that, the two men firing jokes and insults like a ping-pong match that was only interrupted once by Hamlet accidentally backing into a store worker which consequently lead to the newly completed display of ketchup bottles rolling across the floor. Eventually they were all stacked up again and Hamlet and Horatio high-tailed their shopping cart to the cashier to get out of the shop as soon as possible before they caused the death or maiming of an innocent civilian. 

'Your total comes to one hundred and thirty pounds and 67 pence.' The cashier said, digging under their desk and holding their fist out to the men. 'Also you get to have these free movie tickets to see… uh,' the cashier checked the paper slip, 'Molly and her Miraculous Adventure.'

'Oh, um, no thanks, you just missed my child going to her mother’s for the weekend, so we don’t need children’s film tickets, thanks.' Hamlet handed over the money and made to leave.

'No! Wait please take these tickets, it’s the last day if the promotion and I won’t get my bonus if I don’t get rid of these last two tickets.' The cashier pleaded, reaching the tickets over the counter towards the two men. 'You don’t have to even see the film, just please take these tickets.'

'We’re really-'

'We’d be happy to!' Horatio said, stepping forward and watching the cashier's face bloom into relief as he took the tickets. 'What’s the harm, right?' He said, turning to beam at Hamlet.

'Uh, right.' Hamlet rolled his eyes as he steered the trolley out towards the carpark. 'Why did you do that, there may have been a couple of kids coming right behind us that would have been happy to take the tickets and actually use them.'

'Who's to say that we won't use them?' 

'Horatio, c'mon. We are grown men and we have enough pride to stop us from...' Hamlet turned to see Horatio making puppy dog eyes at him. 'Horatio I'm serious I am not going to that film- stop making that face. No. I don't care. There's no way.' 

'But Hamlet! How will we know if Molly’s adventure is really miraculous of we don’t go?'

Twenty minutes later they found themselves sitting in a mostly vacant cinema, munching on popcorn, thoroughly engrossed in Molly’s Miraculous Adventure. They left the cinema in a slightly uncomfortable silence, picked up their shopping from the cinema store-room (the staff had been kind enough to let them leave it there) and wandered back to their block of flats, all the while lugging the shared load of shopping with them.

Finally the door to Hamlet’s apartment swung open and the two men dumped the bags on the kitchen table, putting away the perishable food and leaving the rest in search of a couch to collapse onto. 

Hamlet groaned into a cushion. 'Do you really expect me to do this every time we run out of food?' he asked Horatio.

'The point of doing the shopping is to not run out of food,' Horatio replied, his aching arms dangling off the sides of the couch.   
Hamlet groaned again.

There was a lengthy pause between them, and it was almost as if they had fallen asleep. That was, until Horatio lept to his feet with a gasp.

'What! What?! What happened? What is it?!' Hamlet fell off of the sofa out of surprise to see Horatio look at his wrist in a panic, obviously not finding what he was looking for. 

'Hamlet! What is the time?' he asked. 

'Uh,' Hamlet said, bringing his cracked watch face up to his eyes. 'A quarter after six, why?' he said, bringing himself off the floor where he had landed. 

'I’ve forgotten to feed Shakespeare!' Horatio said, running a hand through his hair. Immediately he darted towards the apartment door. 'Thanks for the day, Hamlet, but I’ve got to go!' he said as he swung the door closed behind him. 

Hamlet was left standing alone in his living room, the silence quite heavy after Horatio’s outburst. '...yeah.' he mumbled as a delayed response to Horatio’s parting words.


End file.
